As you have probably noticed from my lack of blog postings and a missing time period of almost six months, there have been some changes unfolding in my life. I started the year off determined to dedicate it to myself and taking chances on things that I always dreamed of doing, but could not have taken the risks necessary to live through it by how my life was situated before – it was a dramatic turning point for me. However, a few months into the new year and I was pregnant. Somewhere in my plans of big life moments, I always knew I would be pregnant or with my first child at the age of 30. I am now 29 and 30 is just around the corner in August.
My pregnancy was not as unexpected as it might have been – we were trying and at the same time not trying. We just let things happen as they were and indeed things did happen! Although becoming pregnant was a possibility, I was a bit taken aback by the words “Pregnant” that flashed up on the fancy digital pregnancy test that I purchased for fear of misreading the lines. The test even gave an estimate of the time of conception, mines was somewhere from 1 – 2 weeks ago. In the minutes that I glimpsed those words, I froze. My life was changing in another direction – forever. What have I just done?
Evidently, the road map that I laid out for the year was to be put on hold. Early doctors appointments soon followed. The most anticipated appointment was during my 9th week of pregnancy for the dating ultrasound. This would be the first time I would lay eyes on this little thing that was supposedly growing inside of me. In the weeks leading up to that appointment, I was always filled with concerns and as I now know, those feelings never cease. Anyhow, I arrived at the appointment alone (my sister had dropped me off before running errands and my man had work that he couldn’t put off – being a business owner) and laid myself down on the table in the dimly lit room. There was a screen mounted on the wall before me, where I got to see exactly what the ultrasound technician would see. The warmed gel was spread across my belly and I started to get anxious, nervous butterflies started flittering from deep within and then the screen lights up with images. The technician was silent as she continued to move the camera methodically around. A blurry, greyed-out image appeared on the screen and I see something beating – I’m sure it was the heart. There was my baby, almost indistinguishable to the untrained eye. Finally she spoke, telling me there were two babies inside of me. She proceeded to show me one with it’s heart beating strongly, moved the camera to the other side and showed me the other one with it’s own heart beat. I was having twins!